Rules for modern living

Robot Resurrection

2007-12-15T16:04:00.000-08:00

My new blog 2.0 Robot Resurrection is online and being updated.

Bathroom behavior: 5

2007-11-04T09:08:00.000-08:00

There is no "S" in CLR.

Bathroom behavior: 4

2007-10-23T19:14:00.000-07:00

Beware...DeLube!

...Also avoid his and hers temporary sex tatoos.

Uh oh: 1

2007-09-24T22:56:00.000-07:00

Robot 2.0

Read from the bottom

Holy shit!: 1

2007-09-20T13:02:00.000-07:00

I finally finished my new playlist. It only took me like 4 months. I can even remember what is on there!

Dealing with adversity: 2

2007-08-18T18:03:00.000-07:00

Its really more of a strategy than a rule.

Useful facts: 2

2007-08-13T21:10:00.000-07:00

When finding oneself in an emergency situation, look around, perhaps there is a heavy, solid metal door that can be detached and used for nearly any unbelievable application.

So let it be written: 1

2007-08-07T20:30:00.000-07:00

Mickey Avalon is...Mickey Avalon. No doubt about it.

The most important thing: 1

2007-07-26T08:22:00.001-07:00

Always remember to update your blog. (the cute monkey says sorry for me, because I am way too macho to apologize)

Visions of the future: 2

2007-06-24T22:12:00.001-07:00

But never fear, according to Smokey the Bear and The Colonel, the chance of [radioactive] forest fires is low.

Visions of the future: 1

2007-06-24T22:07:00.001-07:00

Apparently the post apocalyptic world of tomorrow is waiting for us all somewhere in eastern Kentucky.

Dangers of the modern world: 1

2007-06-08T07:00:00.000-07:00

In today's world the threat of zombie infection becomes greater everyday. Make sure to know your odds of survival.

Use the right tool: 1

2007-06-07T09:10:00.000-07:00

It is always important to find balance in life. That is why everyone should know about this tool.

Useful facts: 1

2007-05-23T20:37:00.000-07:00

You can't sneak up on a sleeping dolphin, so don't even try.

Signs you're an alcoholic: 1

2007-05-14T13:10:00.000-07:00

"It used to be that when you took a shot of Rumplemintz you had to remember not to swish. Now when you are gargling mouthwash you have to remember not to swallow."

-Paraphrased from Ray Pawulich.

Don't be that guy: 3

2007-05-08T12:42:00.000-07:00

If you have to say something to someone who is walking out the door, make sure to keep it short. If they are jangling their keys, cease speaking immediately.

Shiver me timbers: 1

2007-04-24T22:03:00.000-07:00

Click this link if ye dare...

Bathroom behavior: 3

2007-04-23T13:06:00.000-07:00

No matter how long you are in the shower, the water won't get scalding hot until you are washing your hair.

Buying the gross: 1

2007-04-13T08:03:00.000-07:00

If I see one more advertisement for "Redline" I think I am going to puke.

Deceptions of the modern world: 1

2007-04-09T15:17:00.000-07:00

Sometimes when I am walking around, I think a see crazy people. Then I realize they are just on a bluetooth headset.

Ideas for the future: 1

2007-03-28T22:10:00.000-07:00

I consider it to be something of a slap in the face that no one has made a metal rock opera out of the film Titanic. Lets get on this people.

Kitchen Remodeling Wisdom: 1

2007-03-27T22:17:00.000-07:00

The decision to reface or remodel depends on what you are starting with. You can't fix a bad cabinet with a shiny veneer.

Coincidence: 1

2007-03-18T21:16:00.001-07:00

Why is it that every time I have to do laundry the night before leaving for Louisville at 5 a.m. someone has left their underwear in the dryer at my apartment building? Anyone else ever notice that?

International Politeness: 1

2007-03-07T21:37:00.000-08:00

Always wear clean socks when going someplace where you can't wear shoes.

Television: 1

2007-02-28T20:59:00.000-08:00

When the meteor hit the chicken shack, I knew what had really just happened.

Dealing with adversity: 1

2007-02-25T19:54:00.000-08:00

This one goes out the bitches that stole my credit card last night at B-dubs.

Maintenance: 1

2007-02-25T14:22:00.000-08:00

If you can't fix something with duct tape, maybe it was meant to stay broken.

Bathroom behavior: 2

2007-02-20T18:54:00.000-08:00

Guys, you know how it is awkward when you are at the urinal and everyone leaves but the guy right next to you? It is even worse in a communal shower.

Life: 1

2007-02-18T10:56:00.000-08:00

Be careful who you trust.

Romance: 1

2007-02-14T15:26:00.000-08:00

Valentine's day is a good time to get drunk and make some phone calls you will regret.

Personality: 1

2007-02-09T15:04:00.000-08:00

Everyone should know their personality type. I'm an INFP, just like Neil Diamond.

Snow Driving: 1

2007-02-06T18:06:00.000-08:00

Driving in the snow is like going sledding on a small but dangerous hill.

Don't let the terrorists win: 1

2007-02-01T09:25:00.000-08:00

Beware the mooninites. They have already shut down Boston, and are giving you the finger as hard as they can. Amazing.

Don't be that guy: 2

2007-01-11T14:05:00.000-08:00

Never tell a Jewish person to "have a Jesus filled day", they don't really care for that. In fact, avoid saying "have a Jesus filled day" altogether.

Politics: 1

2007-01-09T21:01:00.000-08:00

Politics on TV can be fun to watch if there are no NFL, college, or high school football games on.

The polite side of gaming: 1

2006-12-30T21:22:00.000-08:00

Gamers: Please do not ignore all stimuli coming from a source other than your xbox.

Non-gamers: please do not treat someone playing a videogame as if they aren't really doing anything.

Bathroom behavior: 1

2006-12-28T22:45:00.000-08:00

When using a public bathroom, make sure everything goes down all the way. If nothing goes down, sneak out before anyone can see who did it.

Don't be that guy: 1

2006-12-27T14:30:00.000-08:00

Treat social situations like the SAT, if you don't have a reasonable answer, leave it blank.

Netiquette: 1

2006-12-26T15:13:00.000-08:00

Just because you are writing online does not mean anyone can understand what you are trying to say without the use of punctuation.

Introduction

2006-12-26T14:50:00.000-08:00

I have decided that in my many travels and experiences that I have picked up an amazing amount of knowledge on...well...everything. I have therefore taken it upon myself dear readers to pass what I have learned on to you in the form of short, nearly meaningless snippets of wisdom. Now the vast ocean of my brain will be open for all the world. Incidentally, despite my vast resource of knowledge, I never quite got spelling down, so please do not dismiss me on account of that. Also, occasionally, my grammar is slightly less than correct, please ignore this. Also, some of these may have no meaning at all, I will leave it to you to decipher which ones. Enjoy!